We are going to go there. “Go where?”, you ask. THERE. The unveiled place. The naked place. The sex place…(hands fly to cover mouths as great big inhales of air sound out in alarming gasps, cheecks blush a crimson red, and my Catholic brothers and sisters make the sign of the cross). “Isn’t this a taboo topic for a Christian?”. It can be and sometimes is, but that’s the whole point in bringing it to the table. WHY is it taboo? WHY do we feel like the moment we have a sexual thought or inclination we have to grab the holy water and exorcise the “sin” right out of us?
For years (almost 14 to be exact) I saw sex as a very exclusive act that only belonged in the context of marriage. Anyone participating in sex outside of marriage was sinning big time and surely would not garner God’s favor until they repented and cleaned their act up. Because of this, any sexual thought or desire I felt was rebuked harshly and treated as a snare of the devil designed to entrap me. While I do believe that God has created healthy parameters in which we can safely express our sexual selves, I do not believe He meant for us to treat it as the unpardonable sin and deny that He created us as sexual beings.
Forgetting that we are made of mind, spirit, and BODY can cause much unnecessary guilt and torment when we experience very healthy and natural biological desires. At the same time, forgetting that we are made of MIND, body, and SPIRIT can cause much unnecessary emotional and spiritual pain and disconnect if we express our sexuality carelessly and treat it as a purely physical thing. So what is the answer? Just do it, or not?
To be honest, I don’t think that I can answer that for you, or you for me. As in many things, I think we need to humbly accept our humanity and acknowledge that we were created with a biological inprint to desire intimacy and sex. We were built for connection and both our chemical and neurological make-up proves this. Likewise, we can’t deny that we were created with emotions and a spiritual connection to God as well; exclusively connecting to one and not the other creates imbalance.
It saddens me that so many people are hiding away riddled by guilt and shame because of their very real human desire for sexual connection. Many are taught to just deny it versus finding healthy ways to discuss it. It also saddens me that many are hurting and wounded over not understanding the emotional and spiritual components that come along with their sexuality. Neither repression nor careless expression seem to be the answer.
So where do you land on this topic? Help us all out here and chime in with your thoughts below 😉